A cup of coffee looks good in the morning

You won't fall asleep after a cup of coffee

Coffee comes with endless refills

Coffee is cheaper

You won't get arrested for ordering a coffee at 3AM

Coffee is out of your system by tomorrow morning

You can make coffee as sweet as you want

You can smoke while drinking coffee

Coffee smells and tastes good

If your coffee pot leaks, you can use a regular paper towel

You can always get fresh coffee

You can turn the pot on, leave the room, and it'll be hot when you get back

They sell coffee at police stations

You can always ditch a bad cup of coffee

Coffee goes down easier

If you put chocolate in your coffee, it doesn't put on weight

No matter how ugly you are, you can always get a cup of coffee

A big cup or a small cup? It doesn't matter

Coffee is good when it's cold too

Coffee stains are easier to remove

Coffee doesn't care when you dunk things in

Coffee doesn't shed

Coffee is ready in 15 minutes or less

You can't get a cup of coffee pregnant by putting cream in it

Coffee doesn't have a time of the month It's good all the time

When coffee gets cold, you can throw it away

Coffee doesn't mind if you wake up at 3AM and decide to have a cup

Instant Coffee!

It can take up to two weeks for coffee to grow mold

Your coffee won't be jealous of a larger cup